ARIAGA 2!!

probably the weirdest movie ever made.




ARIAGA! ARIAGA 2! ARE YOU READY FOR SOME SOCCER???!!!




ahhh... nothing like a little dungeon of doom to cap off a nice relaxing day. crap 90s wrestling at its best. Kevin Sullivan sounds exactly like Cartman for a good portion of this video.

HEXTALL!!!

even if you don't like hockey, there's no way you wont like this video of Ron Hextall beating the shit out of dudes, scoring goals, breaking his stick, slashing and cross-checking like a maniac. he needs to come back, asap.




...and THIS! why not.

CHI PEPS

ok. I know... Finally. I couldn't hold out any longer. Its been a month or two and no CHI PEPS yet. So here's a two-fer. First up - CHI PEPS at MTV SPRING BREAK 1990. YES!!! FUNKY!!! In true early 90s fashion, the crowd is a sea of neon. Oh and also some jacked dudes oiled up, the fresh prince, no shirts, spandex, bikinis, wack hats, and lip-synching. GET FUNKY! NICE.




apparently this is the CHI PEPS first tv appearance - 1984 on the Alan Thicke show. the CHI PEPS come off as some straight up dorks in "wacky" costumes (sick bass playing, btw). necessary viewing if you love neon bike spandex shorts and face paint.

JAMMERS

YES. 1982. Philly. Autistic Behavior playing a raging outdoor gig. The cops try to shut them down but they just keep playing IN TRUE PUNK FASHION. YES!!





WHAT YOU GET WHEN YOU MIX ROIDS, COKE AND MID-90s WRESTLERS!!!!!!

JEEEESSSSUUUSSSSSSS

jeeeesssuuuuuuuuuuussss christ. where the hell do I start with this one? This band's first 2 albums are awesome power metal about blacksmithing and lord of the rings. then... I guess they went nu-metal... and the results are horrible. This is so fucking bad. This is seriously the most budget looking video i've ever seen. This white background dealie seems to be a running theme in shitty videos. The glasses, make-up, gross facial hair, outfits, terrible live footage, everything. Yikes.
If you can make it all the way through this video you are a better human than I. Godspeed.




PS - NEVER FUCK WITH L.A. PARK!

UNREALLLLLLLLL

YES x a million billion!!!!!!!! HOLY SHIT. THIS IS THE BEST VIDEO EVER MADE. I love life.




a bit of a deviation from the normal barrage of shit, but this seriously made me die laughing. Putting a lit cigarette down on some cards - YOU'RE MOSHING. YES. WHAT A BUNCHA CHARACTERS. megathanks to some south philly jabrones for showing me this little piece of video scheisse.

ummmmmmmmmmmm....... right.

Jesus Christ. I bet Suicidal would like to forget about this era. I'm guessing they were trying to go "grunge" or something. Either way, it is horrible. What the fuck kind of dance is Mike Muir doing the whole time? And where the hell is the guy with the Pgh Pirates hat? That guy was the best. Some guy is punching himself in the face and tattooing his hands. I guess this is supposed to be "dark". Total garbage.
Fuck life.





Also......This.

JUST KEEP GOING!

I've probably watched this video 100 times and it made Jared laugh so hard he cried. Try to watch this without cringing. This kid is probably the worst singer i've ever heard. I love it when the band completely falls apart and he insists to "just keep going!!" Hard pitting ensues near the end of the video!!!!! YES!




"Are we gonna walk there?" "No, we gonna STEP!" "2 COLDDDDDDDDDDDDDD SCORRRRRRRPIIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Three of my loves combined here in this one: the 90s, wrestling, and shitty music videos. YES! Whoever directed this is my hero.

Slave to the BLAAAAAAAAAAAADDDDDEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

red leather jacket/no shirt combo, air-humping, guitar thrusting, off-time drumming, visible cable access studio background, drumstick twirls, shitty halloween costumes - YES!!! You're a SLAAAAAAAAAAAVVVVVVVEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!
the guitarist is seriously my favorite thing ever. hilarious faces the entire time.




DEATH METAL WITH HIGH-PITCHED VOCALS AND DAISY DUKES AT A WATER PARK IN 1988! YESSSSSSSSSSSS.
The size of the stage(10')/number of people in attendance ratio (4) is hilarious. A true gem that you need to watch right now.

total garbage

ok, where do I start..... wow. The song is Battlecry "Triumph of the Will", a self-proclaimed "white power metal band." Get it? White Power - Power Metal? UGH. This is complete garbage and I have a hard time believing this is a serious band and not a lost skit from Mr. Show. Mullet/mustache combo - YES. This is less of a video and more of a powerpoint slideshow. Fuck this sucks. The title is 100% correct. There's no way this is real.
PS - Even if you have absolutely no interest in watching this, please at least skip to 2:21. WTF!?




now, enjoy this absolutely terrifying and gory workplace safety video! guhhhhhhhh. seriously, does this need to be so disturbing and gross?

HE'S HEATING UP

ICE CUBE + 1992 OLYMPIC DREAM TEAM - YOU'RE MOSHING. this team still blows my mind. it probably should have been illegal to put all these dudes on one team together... except for Christian Laettner.. WTF? Behind the back passing, alley-oops, dunks, 116-48 final scores... this video is the shit! The closest thing to a real life NBA JAM you will ever see. FROM DOWNTOWN!

PS - SON OF BITCH!

guhhhhhhhhhhh

ummm..... thie is some DIY, New Hampshire shit. 80s off key singing in a dumpster, shitty spraypaint, shoestring headbands, horrible acting, wowza.




this sucks so fucking bad. the dancing is so awkward and uncomfortable. I'm at a loss for words.

WTF FTW

HOLY SHIT. A VIDEO THAT IS ACTUALLY GOOD. I love this so much. Jordan's knee in Ewing's face - you're moshing. The first 5 seconds of this - you're moshing. Jordan dunking on 4 white dudes faces - you're moshing. Manute Bol getting served (0:58) - oh god yes, you're moshing. Fuck, I miss when basketball was actually good.


WOW. this is some wack ass shit... but still "the shit." Random "tribal" art, hindu statues, you're moshing. JJ's first "searching for the answer" (0:33) falsetto yell is pure gold (skip ahead to 1:53 while you're at it to hear Harley have an orgasm... or don't). After watching this a few times you will probably start to like it, unfortunately.



if you are a fan of whiteboy (blond) dreads, puffy vests, thug drummers, gambling, fist pumping, jacked dudes, abandonded buildings, windwilling, and massive crews - seriously, do yourself a favor and watch this video.



potentially the most ridiculous/amazing music video ever made. 2:00 mark, you're losing your mind. the suicidal tendencies look alike drummer is the best. and the singer has amazing braids. i love this.